What day, what time, and how long? My short answer, after twenty years of watching it play out: a Saturday, the ceremony and reception at the same place or close to it with no gap between them, a start time picked with the sunset in mind, and a reception that runs four to six hours and ends on a high note. The rest is the reasoning, and the exceptions.

I call a wedding a movie production: big, expensive (no matter your budget, you are maxing it out), a ton of planning, and you only get one take. Timing works the way it does for the studios: blockbusters come out in the summer because that is when the audience is free. Your guests are your audience.

Saturday night

Still the most popular slot: most guests have that day and the next off. The catch is the gap. A 1 o'clock ceremony with a 5 o'clock reception leaves your guests wandering for hours. Hold the reception right after the ceremony, and if a gap is unavoidable, tell everyone in advance. Don't surprise them. The other catch is availability: the popular Saturdays at the popular venues go more than a year out.

Saturday afternoon

Same benefits, usually without the gap. But people don't dance as much in daylight: kids in tow, less to drink, and more people feel comfortable dancing in the dark. Your venue may also cap your time because an evening wedding is coming in behind you.

Sunday

Not a heck of a difference from Saturday, except most people work the next day, so they leave early. I'd recommend wrapping up between 9 and 10. Know where your guests are coming from: flying in, they are at a hotel and they will stay; driving an hour home, they may leave at 9 when your reception ends at 10. See what I'm saying?

Friday night

A great option. Most guests have the next day off, and availability tends to be better. The tradeoffs: your wedding party takes the day off, and Friday rush hour loves to collide with a 4 o'clock ceremony. Plan for it (shuttles, a car for family, a later start).

Weekdays

I have worked a wedding on every day of the week, so I say this with experience: personally, don't do it. Your guests are coming from work and going back to work, and a majority of people do not want to let loose on a Tuesday. It's just the way it is. I've done a lot of successful weekday weddings, but it's not the same. The money won't replace the memories.

Holidays

A three-day weekend makes Sunday a strong option, the Friday after Thanksgiving has the family in town already, and New Year's Eve weddings rock. The drawbacks: everything books early, and not everyone wants to give up a holiday weekend. Be mindful of your guests and wedding party.

Sporting events

I always recommend against the night of a major game. This can suck, I know. It's not like you knew, when you booked the venue two years out, that the Red Sox would be in the World Series and THAT would be game 7. Somebody streams it on a phone, and suddenly there is a crowd around one person during dancing time (I had that happen with a regular season game). (Yoda voice) Mindful you must be.

The sun

On this coast the sun sets around 8:20 on a Saturday in mid-June, around 5:50 in late October, and by 4:40 in mid-January. That decides whether your photos happen in daylight and whether an outdoor ceremony ends in the dark. This tool takes your date and hands back sunset, golden hour, and the time I would want your ceremony finished so the photos happen in daylight.

Length of the reception

A delicate balancing act: too short and you cut the dancing off, too long and people hit their ceiling. I suggest four to six hours outside of the ceremony. The longest I've done is eight, and if you plan for it, it can work.

The question I always ask a couple: how do you want it to end? Let it taper off and people remember it less fondly. End on a high note with a sendoff, while people still have energy. If a 10 o'clock ending gives you a better sendoff than 11, why not? I am not saying end early (I never have), only that the path to take is the one your guests remember for years to come. The Run of Show Builder takes your ceremony time and the venue's hard stop and shows you how much dance floor you are left with, before you sign anything.

What usually goes wrong here

The gap: a ceremony booked before the reception venue, and three empty hours in the middle of the day. Then the venue's end time, found out after the invitations went out. Ask both before you put down a deposit.

My biggest piece of advice is not to let money dictate your timing (easier said than done, I know). In my opinion you are better off at a cheaper venue on a Saturday night than at an expensive one on a weekday. Next: the location.

Thanks! Chuck